


If You'll Let Me...Blair's Turn

by 852_Prospect_Archivist



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Drama/Romance, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 05:38:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/794498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/852_Prospect_Archivist/pseuds/852_Prospect_Archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Blair tries to move a relationship along.<br/>Sequel to At Least That's Normal...Jim's Saga.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If You'll Let Me...Blair's Turn

These are my first stories posted anywhere. Feedback is welcome. Thanks to Callisto for beta-reading this and to Janra for trying to. This story should be read following "At Least That's Normal-Jim's saga". They are a duet. This one is entirely Blair's POV. 

Standard disclaimers apply. All characters belong to Pet Fly and I am making no money from this. These can be archived. 

// indicates song lyrics. The song used is "My Love Is A Rock" by Reo Speedwagon. Lyrics are used without permission. Oh rating is G. 

## If you'll let me... Blair's turn 

by Eriker  


You know for being twenty seven there are very few things in life I have been absolutely sure of. I happened to stumble across a big one recently and it is not something to be dealt with lightly. I am very much in love with my best friend. This would normally be the best way for a relationship to start but right now I'm more than a little confused. He should be coming down to breakfast any minute and there we arrive at half the problem. *He* is my roommate and very, very male. Oh so male and butch and chiseled.. there I go again. To my knowledge he is straight but then again so was I until recently. Every vibe I get from him tells me that he wants me maybe even loves me. Everything he does for me tells me that I am not wrong and that this is something that will last forever. I can make it forever if he'll let me. I want it to so badly and I wish I had someone to talk to about it. The only one I can trust for advice is Jim and I can't very well ask him how he would seduce himself. Or can I? This may be the best opportunity to feel out how ready he is to move up to the next level of our relationship. If I am careful this could work. Okay here he comes... show time. 

"Hey Jim, can I ask you something serious?" Good start. I am so good at keeping things light aren't I? 

"Sure Chief, what's up?" He seems cautious. That's normal. 

>   
> //My love is a rock, an immovable force  
> Anywhere that you are, my love is right here  
> With any tick of the clock  
> Life can change it's course  
> But my love will not  
> My love is a rock//  
> 

"All right you know you are like my oldest and wisest friend..." Oh boy, good one, bring up the age difference right away. Nice work Sandburg. 

"Oldest ....ouch" He is so sensitive about that. Great. He must know I don't care how old he is. 

>   
> //Headed out into uncharted waters  
> What you feel is your only guide  
> And each step that you take brings you closer  
> Just trust what you feel inside//  
> 

"No man you are my best friend, really. I need some advice and considering that you are, like, the person I trust the most , so I thought you would be the most qualified to answer." Compliments are always good. I love this man. 

"Yeah Chief get on with it." He looks on edge and almost scared. 

>   
> //'Cause something's telling you to keep on going  
> Telling you that your aim is true  
> Could be the voice of reason, or just blind devotion  
> Whatever it is, it's calling out to you, singing....//  
> 

"Okay how do you know when...no that's not the quite the right question. I already know how I feel . I guess my question is how do you start a relationship?" Okay I'm the one who is scared now. He is going to know what I'm asking and kick me out. No I know I am right about his signals. He would never kick me out and I can't leave him. It would be too much. I don't want to be alone again. 

"Chief?!" He looks like he just lost his best friend. 

>   
> //My love is a rock, an immovable force  
> Anywhere that you are, my love is right here  
> With any tick of the clock  
> Life can change it's course  
> But my love will not  
> My love is a rock//  
> 

"Yeah I know it seems silly coming from me but I have this friend and I want things to grow. I get the feeling that this friend wants the same but I am having a bit of trouble figuring out what the first step should be." He looks lost again. I hope that he understands what I am really asking. He must. 

"Blair I don't think I can help you with this one." Oh no you don't. You do know what I'm asking and are backing away. I won't let you. I need you here, with me. 

>   
> //Mixed messages shoot through a wire  
> Tender turmoil in your voice  
> Change is spreading through you like a fire  
> Bridges are burning, you made your choice//  
> 

"But you were married and so at some point you thought Carolyn was the "One". I had never even considered forever before I met this person. I think this might be the "One" for me. If I start this I want it to go all the way and never look back. It logically follows that I need to start the relationship as correctly as possible." I am giving you my heart Jim. Please take my offering. 

"My marriage had nothing "correct" in it. Carolyn and I didn't start as good friends. It took a divorce to make us friends. Our friendship is a bond formed during the trauma of splitting up. I'm not good at starting relationships." We have started, love, but we need to keep moving and I can't do it alone. 

>   
> //And as you're searching for peace in your world  
> You may find yourself spinning around, and around, and around  
> While the pain you've endured  
> Only serves to make you surer  
> Of the strength you have found, and then....//  
> 

"Okay so your marriage was not a good example but you are good at reading people. I know you've learned a lot in life and I thought you could tell me what you would do in this situation." I need this affirmation. I need you to tell me how you would start a relationship if you ever chanced it again . I am not always as strong as I seem and I need to know if I'm right and you love me too. 

"Well if I was in that situation I guess I would just keep being a good friend and step up the intensity. Let the friendship become love on it's own. Start doing little things for the person that may not seem important but add up. Let her see for herself what life could be like if you were "together". Go slow and build a strong base. Oh and keep lines of communication open. That was my mistake. I still think I am the wrong person to ask. You know Simon was always big into the romance thing. You could call him." Yes, you do love me. This is what has been happening between us for so long. I wonder, would doing a little happy dance would freak him out? Wait..."herself"... is he asking for some confirmation too? 

>   
> //You may not be looking for love, but love may find you  
> You may choose to close your eyes and run  
> You may leave love far behind you//  
> 

"Oh man you...that was beautiful Jim. Thanks. That was the most 'on' advice I've ever gotten. Underneath it all I think we do think alike. You just confirmed everything I was thinking. I will start that course of action ASAP and I'm sure he'll fall for it and me. Uh...Jim are you still with me man?" What was that? It almost looked like a zone-out. I know I was being bit blatant but I didn't think It would cause that big of a shock. No, it wasn't a shock...it was a dawning. I saw it! He knows what I'm asking. If I can read his answer by that smile I am going to have a very good rest of my life. 

"Hmm? Yeah I'm here. Where else would I be?" He looks so determined. Well so am I. 

>   
> //In your eyes I can see the future  
> In your heart I can always trust  
> In your mind I will live on forever  
> In your arms I will turn to dust//  
> 

"How late did you say we had to stay at the station tonight?" There is no time like the present. I just love this man. 

"Just long enough to finish up the paperwork for this week's bust then we are off for the weekend." He looks so determined. Good, I am not letting him go ever. I hope he understands what he just got himself into. 

>   
> //These are feelings like I have never known  
> The song of my very soul  
> I can no longer silently sing it  
> I'm gonna take it to the mountain and let it roll singing.....//  
> 

"Cool. Let's pick up some dinner on the way home and some videos. I'll treat. " This will be a very good weekend. I will not let him out of my sight. 

"You're buying? Oh boy, remind me to give you advice more often." His smile is almost blinding but he looks sad at the same time. Why? 

>   
> //My love is a rock, an immovable force  
> Anywhere that you are, my love is right here  
> With any tick of the clock  
> Life can change it's course  
> But my love will not  
> My love is a rock//  
> 

"Let's go. I'll get your coat." I hand him his leather as he stares at the floor. He isn't going to fight this is he? Jim, man, I can make you happy if you'll let me.   
  


* * *

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